The other day, as my son and I were piecing together one of his favourite puzzles, he looked up and said something that stopped me in my tracks:
“Mom, I work better when it’s quiet. Can we turn the music off?”
That moment was small but profound. He wasn’t just asking for silence; he was advocating for himself. He recognized what he needed to succeed in that moment and communicated it clearly. And let me tell you, for kids (and adults) with ADHD, this skill—self-advocacy—can be a game changer.
Why Self-Advocacy Matters
Self-advocacy is the ability to understand your own needs and confidently express them. For individuals with ADHD, it’s a cornerstone of success. Why? ADHD often comes with unique ways of processing the world, and recognizing what helps or hinders you is crucial for navigating life’s challenges.
Think about a classroom setting. A child with ADHD might struggle with loud group activities. If they can say, “I do better working on my own” or “Can I have a break after this?” they’re taking charge of their needs. They’re not asking for an advantage but levelling the playing field.
Teaching Advocacy Through Everyday Moments
Building self-advocacy skills doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process rooted in creating safe spaces where kids can explore their feelings, preferences, and challenges. Here’s how I approach it:
1. Start with Choices
Children feel empowered when they’re given choices. It could be as simple as, “Do you want to draw or play a game?” Over time, they learn that their preferences matter and can shape their environment.
2. Model the Language
If I notice my son getting overwhelmed, I might say, “It looks like the noise is bothering you. Do you want to ask for some quiet time?” This validates his feelings and gives him the words to advocate for himself.
3. Celebrate Their Voice
When my son speaks up for what he needs, I celebrate it. “Great job telling me you needed a break!” Recognizing their efforts helps strengthen their confidence and motivates them to express themselves more frequently.
Advocacy in Action: Real-Life Wins
One day, during a playdate, my son turned to his friend and said, “Can we play one game at a time? It helps me focus.”
It wasn’t just about the game—it was a glimpse into the future. A future where he could navigate school, work, and relationships with the tools to communicate his needs effectively.
Advocacy Skills Build Independence
Strong self-advocacy isn’t just about managing ADHD; it’s about fostering independence. Kids who learn to identify and voice their needs early on carry that skill into adulthood. They’re better equipped to set boundaries, seek accommodations, and advocate for themselves in all areas of life.
How You Can Help
If you’re a parent, teacher, or caregiver, know that you play a pivotal role in this journey. Empower the children in your life by listening to their needs, validating their feelings, and encouraging them to speak up.
Because here’s the truth: advocacy isn’t just a skill. It’s a superpower. And when kids with ADHD embrace that superpower, the possibilities are endless.
Need support in fostering advocacy skills for your child?
I’m here to help! Schedule a personalized 1:1 consultation with me today. Together, we can help your child thrive.
Recommended Products for Building Self-Advocacy Skills in People with ADHD
ADHD-friendly planners help individuals break tasks into manageable steps, set reminders, and maintain organization. These tools encourage self-advocacy by allowing users to own their time and responsibilities.
Example: Look for updated ADHD planners with daily, weekly, and monthly layouts to track goals and commitments.
Journals designed to help children and adults track their emotions, moods, and behaviours can be an excellent tool for self-advocacy. Writing down experiences and feelings allows individuals to articulate their needs more effectively.
For example, “Self-Care for People with ADHD: 100+ Ways to Recharge” can provide emotional regulation techniques and self-reflection exercises.
Books written for individuals with ADHD can offer practical tips, coping strategies, and success stories. These books often empower readers to advocate for themselves by understanding their condition and strengths.
Example: Search for titles like “ADHD and Me” or “The ADHD Toolkit” for a blend of strategies and personal growth.
Visual cues and flashcards can be helpful tools for children with ADHD. These visual reminders can support decision-making and create a clear structure for managing daily tasks.
Example: Simple flashcards with visuals for tasks like “finish homework,” “take a break,” or “ask for help” can aid children in advocating for themselves.
Sensory products like fidget toys or textured mats can help individuals with ADHD manage impulsivity and focus. These tools support self-regulation, allowing them to better articulate when they need a break or additional support.
These tools can be found by searching for specific keywords related to ADHD, self-regulation, or emotional well-being. Remember, each person’s needs are unique, and experimenting with different tools can help identify what works best.
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